Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation — The Spoiler-Free Movie Reviews

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to find out what all the Gabbing Geek crew thought of the latest Mission: Impossible movie.  We’ve gathered all the reviews into those one convenient location and this is not at all a trap to lure you into our secret plan.  Nope.  Not a trap at all.  Just some spoiler-free movies reviews.  Do you trust us?  Good.  Head after the break to find out what we thought!  (We’ll be updating throughout the day as more of the crew sees it so check back often!)

Ryan: I loved loved loved this movie.  This is exactly what I want from a summer movie and from a Mission: Impossible movie.  It had spectacular chases, some impressive set pieces, and an incredible sense of pacing throughout.  What made this movie the best of the series is that it poked fun at itself throughout, but never so much so that it became a parody.  In this fifth movie in the series, the previous four mattered in significant ways (unlike a certain dino-sequel which we shall not discuss today).  And there are many scenes that, while it’s still summer action, had extra levels of mystery–scenes with 3 or 4 different groups all up against each other and you’re not exactly sure who is on what side.  What an adventure, what a ride!

Score: 9.5 out of 10 rapid-printed 3D latex masks!

Jimmy: A good but not great follow up to Ghost Protocol. This review will come off as sounding harsh, but I did like it, there just wasn’t anything here that blew me away.  The story is not as good. The interactions of the main characters is almost non-existence. Ghost Protocal was all about this group being a team. This go around it felt more like they were getting in Cruise’s way. The humor which made the last one such a blast is nowhere to be seen. The set pieces while good, were really nothing memorable. I think the best one was Cruise holding onto the side of the plane…which we’ve seen over and over again in the trailer and advertising for the last six months. And I’m not sure why, I guess spies are spies, but I couldn’t shake the feeling throughout that I was watching a Bond movie, not Mission: Impossible.  See, it sounds like I’m thrashing it, and I’m sure Ryan will feel my grade is harsh, but it is worth watching, just don’t expect the same magic. But do expect another sequel.

Score: 7.5 out of 10 red boxes

Jenny: I went into this movie expecting it to be fun. Which really means – I didn’t care if it was a mindless summer flick or not. I usually don’t grade movies like these very harshly in the first place, because – let’s be honest, it’s just another Bond movie mixed and swizzled vs. shaken not stirred. All in all it was a fun movie. I liked the mystery, I liked the crazy stunts, and ultimately I liked the storyline. My favorite thing about the whole movie was Rebecca Ferguson. She is amazing! She’s the exact kind of spy I would expect to see – regardless of her gender – she totally kicks ass. But here is where what I love the most clashes with what I hate. Ferguson’s Ilsa is the only female in the movie. Technically there are women everywhere – but Ilsa is the only one with prominent speaking lines and plot development. That one simple fact makes me wonder…what the hell were they doing when they cast this movie? There was plenty of room in this movie for more women. So I’m torn. I loved the “fun” of the movie – which is a basically a huge cock fight – but hate that Rebecca was the only one left to fulfill the “obligatory woman” quota for the film. I think they could have gender swapped some of those roles (Minus our core team, because I love Simon Pegg, Ving Rhames, Jeremy Renner, and Tom Cruise). Alec Baldwin could have easily been played by Diane Lane or Glenn Close. And ultimately, there are plenty of “bad guys” that could have also been played by women. All in all – it’s still a fun film, but I was a little let down that Hollywood is still arbitrarily limiting female roles.

Score: 7 out of 10 Bassoon Rifles