Gender Swapped Twilight Still Sucks

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You know what many successful authors do?  They try to come up with new stories!

Stephanie Meyer apparently thinks that’s for suckers!

Yes, perhaps in part due to the tenth anniversary of Twilight, author Stephanie Meyer has released a new book.  It’s called Life and Death:  Twilight Reimagined.

So, what did she change?  Did she make her characters interesting?  The relationships reflect how actual people think?  She spelled out that Bella’s choices were either necrophelia or beastiality?  Just 300 pages of apologies?

Nah, she just switched the genders of the characters.

Bella is now a Beau.  Edward is Edythe.  Jacob is Julie.

She says she was bothered by people thinking Bella was just a damsel in distress, so she wanted to prove that any normal human surrounded by superpowers would look that way.

You know what?  Bella being the damsel in distress isn’t what made her weak.  What made Bella weak was her obsessive, co-dependent relationship with Edward, the way she teased Jacob, and seemed to have no personal interests other than always being with her man.  Seriously, what made Bella interesting outside her relationship?

OK, let’s be honest:  her relationship wasn’t that interesting either.  Anyone who thinks a man breaking into your house to watch you sleep is romantic probably needs to file a restraining order on someone.

Bella has a shallow relationship based off, I’m guessing, teenage hormones.  That sort of stuff cannot last.  Bella puts herself in incredibly dangerous situations just to get visions of Edward in one book.  That is NOT HEALTHY.

As for Edward, the guy comes across as a control freak.  He dictates everything about their relationship.  He is emotionally and psychologically manipulative in his dealings with her.  These two are not equals.  And its not just because of the superpowers.  An ordinary guy treating Bella that way would be just as bad.  And you know what?  Jacob’s not a whole lot better there.

Oh, and by the by, would writers everywhere please stop using Romeo and Juliet as an example of how awesome love is?  They both die, and given that their ages are between 16 and 14 when they meet, I’m guessing that had they lived it wouldn’t have been a relationship to last the ages.  They’re both stupid teenagers who overreact on a routine basis on what love is.

Thanks, Stephanie Meyer, for teaching girls everywhere what a bad relationship looks like.  Making Bella a boy doesn’t fix that.

 

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