Simpsons Did It!: “Principal Charming”

the-simpsons

Up until this point, Marge’s sisters Patty and Selma seem to have been fairly interchangeable.

That will change now.

Few things set Patty and Selma apart.  They look very similar.  They both smoke, work at the DMV, and hate Homer.  But there are differences.  Selma, for one, wants some romance in her life.  Patty, at this stage, not so much.  Patty chose celibacy.  Selma had it thrust upon her.

So, when Marge calls up a favor from Homer to find Selma a husband, off he goes.  Using some sort of Terminator-ish vision, he eliminates all manner of men and billboards he sees until he finally gets to Principal Skinner.

The plan even seems to be working…until Skinner falls for the wrong twin and starts to date Patty.

More recent episodes would out Patty as a lesbian, so her distaste for Skinner in retrospect makes for a certain amount of sense.  She has no interest in romance with anyone.  Selma does.  Selma sinks lower and lower the more Patty and Skinner date, all while Bart seems to run the school with lovesick Skinner uninterested in stopping much of anything.

Filling in some of the empty spots in the lives of its extended cast is something The Simpsons does very well.  Here we get a lot more on both Marge’s sisters and Skinner.  There’s even a bit of Barney thrown in, as Homer does arrange for Selma to have a date with apparently the only other available man he can find.  Barney has his heart broken for about ten seconds before he realizes he can have a whole pitcher of beer to himself at Moe’s, which also happens to be Homer’s emergency contact at the school.

Say, how does Moe know Skinner?  Does Skinner call there often enough?  He must.

The status quo reasserts itself.  Patty will not marry Skinner.  Skinner will clamp down on Bart again.  And Selma will, for the nonce, forget about wanting a man in her life.

Oh, we got some first appearances here.  First was Hans Moleman.  But the more memorable one does indeed shout out something about how he’ll be back.

Yes, we haven’t seen the last of Groundskeeper Willy.

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