Simpsons Did It!: “Separate Vocations”


In the hallowed halls of Springfield Elementary, Bart is a prankster goof-off, and Lisa is a good student who behaves herself.

When the two somewhat switch roles, it is a little surprising that they are each better at the other’s respective roles.

After taking a career aptitude test, Bart learns he should be a cop, while Lisa is best suited to be a homemaker.  Bart is at first nonplussed, while Lisa is horrified as she already had a career as a blues musician mapped out in her mind.  Then some music store guy tells her she has stubby fingers, a genetic thing often inherited from the father (cue Homer unable to hold a can of beer).

Why is no one worried Milhouse was given the career of “military strongman”?

Lisa is so dejected by the news, she quits the band and starts hanging out in a bad girls’ bathroom.

Bart meanwhile goes on a  ride-along with cops Lou and Eddie.  While ignoring blatant hold-ups to observe Sideshow Mel roller skating with his Afghan hound, the two eventually pursue Snake with a cache of stollen lottery tickets that ends with Bart given a gun and almost getting killed.

Nice job of the commercial break placement here, by the by.

Given the taste of power, Bart becomes a hall monitor for Principal Skinner and cleans up the school.  Lisa, meanwhile, is directing pranks that hit Skinner where it really hurts.  That poor taxidermed puma…

As much as a fascist Bart is running the school, even allowing poor Mr. Glasscock an opportunity to come back to work, Lisa takes things too far in the other direction by stealing all the teacher’s editions of the textbooks.  Coming face to face with each other, Bart and Lisa have a realization.  Lisa went too far, and she knows it.  Bart takes the fall, and his good behavior only nabs him 300, no 400, hold it 500, no 600 days detention.  Looks like he’ll be in detention until the sixth grade or so at that rate.

Kind words from Bart get Lisa back on the saxophone, so he’ll have someone he can borrow money from.

Oh, and Milhouse is the new hall monitor.  I see that military strongman career is starting off rather well…

By the way, Bart often has weird day dreams depicting various awful fates, like being a drifter or something, to which he invariably says, “Cool!”  But he isn’t hot on being a snitch, even though it gets him to hear himself with his voice altered to sound like the late Steve Allen.

Which also means we got to hear Steve Allen say, “Ay caramba!”

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