This is Scarlett Johansson. She stars in movies. She’s gorgeous. Critics love her. Her last ten films have averaged 82% on Rotten Tomatoes. She’s about to play Black Widow for the fourth time. She even managed to pull in decent money with a horribly scripted action film, Lucy. And yet Marvel still won’t give her a Black Widow solo film. Because, really, who wants to look at this ugly mug for two hours?
But don’t worry, other studios have decided that putting her on screen kicking butt three ways from Sunday is exactly what fans want so they’re letting her lead a live action remake of the classic anime story Ghost in the Shell. Variety reports that she will be “a member of a covert ops unit of the Japanese National Public Safety Commission that specializes in fighting technology-related crime.”
Oh who the hell cares? Nobody is reading this post. You’re still staring at that picture. I could write random gibberish for three more paragraphs and you wouldn’t even realize it. Harmmmdhro likkle boompadda dappa. Mecha lecha hi mecha hiney ho. Teletubbies make me giggle.